Confused , And yeaaah , so whaad if i am headstrong ?

So , i was once so in love-d with Red Cross , many things happened , because of Red Cross , i am getting sick , getting tired , find it a joke , full of nonsense , crap , craaaaaaaaap . Things are getting in my way , i am so sick of it that i lost my passion in Red Cross . Ater the camp , i finally saw the glimmer of hope , i finally had a teeeenny weeeeenny sense of passion back , why did youu have t burst my only little bubble ? Why ? Tell me why are youu being just so , (...) well , i d k whaad t say , so are youu really not giving our batch a chance ? Youu know how much it hurts when i heard whaad youu told youur most belove-d batch of sec3s ? Can youu just feel the teeeeenny weeeeenny bit that we really are trying t bring up our discipline , yeaaah , maybe for the rest i d k , but i am sure youu can see that there were atleast a few of us who really wanted t change . Whaad did we get in the end ? Telling the sec3s , sec2s 离我越远越好 , youu know how much it hurts just by hearing how cold blooded you are . I tried t change my views of youu , but youu did exactly the same old thing , or should i say you became even more heartless , that i can't make mysel t like youu , i am not backstabbing or whtvr your friends or alumni(s) are speaking for youu said , i aam telling the truth , you don't give a damn shit t us , do youu ? Even if youu or youur alumni(s) see this , i am prepared for any consequences , i can't bottle this up anymore . I really can't , i did tried t , but i can't for the ma'am , who spoke for youu , i think Chingting should know who i am refering t . I shall tell youu here , since i d k when can i really tell youu , i don't think youu would read my blog , since you dislike me so much . Well , you didn't really state that you dislike me or whtvr , but some things i can feel it . Okaay , i really hate you deep down t the core , no i don't hate youu , i dislike youu , i know , i may not be a dancer , you might not like me or know me or whtvr , i don't care . Stop being bias against me , will youu ? during footdrill competition trainings , youu said i am not serious , youu reprimanded me , but do youu know , how tired , how sick i was feeling back then ? No , obviously youu don't , i almost feeling like passsing out , but youu scolded me , fine , when we lost , youu comforted youur dancers , ohh like wow , whaad am i , yeaaaah , shit , forget it , wednesday , when i wear my uniform , my shoelaces loose , i went to a corner t tied it up , my dress was just on the sit , i didn't sit , i didn't , youu scolded me for sitting , i didn't speak a word , but that didn't mean i did , faye , youu saw it , i didn't sit , why didn't youu speak up for me ? forget it . I mean nothing , isn't it ? I am just a worthless piece of shit in everyone's eyes . Lynette = Nothing / Who on earth is that ? / Ohh , youu mean that shit ? Okaaay , maybe i offended those dancers by saying all these stuffs , but i don't wanna care anymore , cause no one gives a damn t me . So ,go ahead and spam my blog . And yeaaaaaaaaah , the defination of lynette , Lynette = a pathetic counsellor No one listens t me , everyones gives me trouble , when their names are taken down , they bloody blame me , oh well , how pathetic can i get ? Well , that's life . But whaad's worse ? Why th hell am i the odd one out ? Why do i have this bloody efvective communication exams ? Why me !? Why can't i just say quit like how others do ? Why wouldn't you let me do so ? Why !? I don't enjoy myself there , i drag my way there , going there's worse than hell , why can't i have th original teachers and classmates back like last year , everything's keep changing , its making me sick . If i were just a normal kid out there , i could have enjoy-ed myself in the activities i had like others do , instead of writing and writing and writing like a fool . All we did is just writing , serious , whaad's the point ? I hate it . I don't care about having another cert ! I don't give a damn t cert , alright ? I just wanna be a normal kid , mum . )': I am breaking down , i really am . If i never joined council board , i wouldn't have been so (...) , i hate it , and how's my clique , i thought we were back to the funn times again ,but after that everything went back t a square one . Why don't youu let me out of the clique , i see no point , i really dojn't see any . When i realised youu everytime had activities with them , but never asked me t go in , i felt like , i d k , it hurts me more when i know all my clique members going t Compass , and no one asked me out , don't give me all those excuses , whaad i have Red Cross friends or whtvr , no one stpoped youu from asking me , but none of youu did , let me go , girls . I am tired , let me go . And boy , hope youu see this , i no longer have the feeling for youu , youu hurt me in the past , i cried , i grieve-d i did everything just t forget youu , and yeaaaah , i think baby , i am over youu .